Hogzilla

Participants:

david_icon.jpg jolie_icon.jpg haldor_icon.jpg rupert_icon.jpg maia_icon.jpg

Scene Title Hogzilla
Synopsis The Scions use teamwork for once to take down a Nemean boar going through Times Square! They're acting like a proper band of Scions! Then crazyness occurs at Rupert's Penthouse Suite at the Diamond: It involves kissing!

Times Square

Times Square is one of the most recognizable areas for both strangers and residents of New York City, if only for the marquee that circles around the 25-story Times building, after which the city was named. The New York Times is no longer here, but the moving sign remains, giving headlines, election results and other news. Once a dangerous place to be, the Square was redeveloped in the 1980s into what it is today. Times Square hosts the largest, oldest and best known New Year's Eve celebration in the world, marked by the 100-year-old tradition of lowering a ball atop One Times Square. Times Square welcomes millions of international visitors annually and is the home of many of the world's most respected communications and entertainment companies. The Times Square area boasts 150 restaurants and 39 Broadway theatres, among them the beautifully restored New Victory Theatre and Disney's New Amsterdam Theatre. The whole area has a feeling of /life/ about it, a vibrant atmosphere that pervades everything - morning, noon and night..


Jolie steps out of a movie theatre after a triple-feature Evil Dead marathon, totally psyched and cheerful. "Nothing like watching Ash kick some ass," she murmurs with a smile.

Midnight triple feature in Times Square? It's the sort of thing that gets fans out in force, inspires people to wear costumes. There are hordes of Shielas, an abundance of Ash, quite a few people dressed as medieval knights, at least one guy dressed like a tree who kept trying to snake a vine up the skirts of females who get too close. Then there's the guy in the rubber mask and the skull helmet who draws up alongside Jolie and holds out a bucket of popcorn.

Jolie is a big fan of the skull motif. "Nice helmet," she says to the guy. She reaches into the bucket and pulls out a handful of popped corn. "Thanks. Have a good time? I hear they're gonna do a Romero filmathon next month. All the Of The Deads."

"You'd think," the man with David's voice, inside the helmet, "That a girl like you would be -tired- of zombies by the time she got to a movie theater. Y'know, doctors don't watch Dougie Howser, MD. At least, I don't think so. Do they?" He tugs the mask up and off, brushes a hand through his beard to straighten it, but leaves the helmet on while he tucks the mask into his belt.

Jolie laughs as David reveals himself. "I shoulda known it was you. And of course doctors watch doctor shows. Because they never get the medical stuff right on TV." She winks, then munches on the popcorn.

"So, what? You never raised an army of angry zombies by mis-speaking a word or two? I saw a guy with a chainsaw grafted onto his arm, once. And this one time, in Japan…well, let's just say that place is -really- fucked up and you do -not- want to be alone with the trees." Brows waggle as the Monkey Prince grins at the necromancer.

"No, I've never messed that up, but that's just because I'm that good," Jolie brags. "I wouldn't mind visiting Japan one of these days, but anyplace that sells used underwear in vending machines needs a little intervention."

We find Jolie and David in front of a movie theatre that has just let out its patrons after a Evil Dead marathon. There are people in costume. David is wearing a skull helmet. Jolie is just wearing an Evil Dead tshirt and jeans. They are sharing popcorn.

It's New York City. More importantly, it's Times Square in New York City. People actually do run into people they know in Times Square in New York City by complete and utter accident or coincidence. Sometimes these path crossings are more sinister than others, possibly machinations of the gods themselves. All things considered, Jolie, David, and Haldor may never know for certain if it was coincidence or some terrible machination.

Haldor is making his way across Times Square with a stack of dry cleaning slung over his shoulder. For the most part, he looks to have nothing but hoodies and black pants in the heap of dry cleaning, but you never know what might be lurking in the midst of the pile.

"I mean, the food is coo. I had sushi once, watch out for that wasabi stuff, it'll clear your - oops!" As she babbles, Jolie bumps into Haldor. "Sorry bout that!"

"Yeah. No harm done," replies Haldor. The Viking recovers from the bump quickly enough, shifting his body to the side to side-step around Jolie. He, apparently, doesn't notice David just this moment. Instead he offers a subdued, vague smile and a nod of his head to Jolie.

Jolie returns the smile and nod, with a little bit of a double take. "Do I know that guy?" She shrugs, then waits outside of a 24/7 convenience mart so that David can get a snack. "Man's got a bottomless gut," she mutters.

He does look like that guy Maia was talking about, if Jolie really thinks about it. Tall. Nordic. Red hair. Big metal bracer engraved with Futhark runes on his left forearm. You know, stuff that's kind of generic.

Haldor, however, hasn't really learned terribly much about his fellow Scions from Maia. Well, you know, except that Rupert The motherfucking Ripper is one. The Viking continues on his way, moving toward the Starlite Diner down the way.

Jolie blinks. Red head. Bracer. She yells out, "Hey, Big Red, you live with a Japanese chick?" Yeah, not the best opening, but she's thinking as fast as she cane to get his attention.

Haldor freezes mid-step and slowly twists to peer over his shoulder at Jolie. The Viking has a very puzzled expression on his face that borders on outright suspicion as he slowly turns to face her. "What?"

Jolie wiggles her fingers in greeting. "Heya. I come in peace, man. I know Maia, and she told me that she was living with a big redheaded guy. Is that you?"

Jolie wiggles her fingers in greeting. "Heya. I come in peace, man. I know Maia, and she told me that she was living with a big redheaded guy. Is that you?"

Haldor still seems vaguely unconvinced that he isn't about to be jumped by Jolie… Or someone more terrifying. The Viking starts moving closer, though his attention shifts around him to make sure he's not about to be jumped. "Yeah, unless she's hiding someone else in that mini-palace. She hasn't mentioned you to me though, I don't think."

Jolie pouts. "Really? Man, I'm gonna have to give her a talking to. I'm Jolie and…mini-palace? It looks like I really do need to stop by and check this out."

"Well, I guess mini-palace is kinda exaggerating it… But it is a whole floor of an apartment building."

Haldor rubs the back of his neck slightly with his left hand. While he's doing that, his right arm shifts a little bit to better shoulder the weight of his dry cleaning. For a few moments, Haldor studies Jolie before offering another cheery, if subdued, smile.

"So, uh. What can I do for you?"

"Me?" Jolie points at herself, and then smiles. "Oh, nothin. I was just saying hello and stuff." She lowers her voice a little. "She told me that she'd rescued you. Glad that guy didn't take you, that woulda been bad for everybody. I'm not too happy with that traitorous sunavagun."

"Oh, fuck," A British-accented voice comments. Rupert is walking through the parking lot and has spotted the two. "Can't go anywhere without running into you lot, can I? Afraid to find out what'd happen if I went off to take a piss."

Haldor starts to say something, but is cut off by Rupert. For a moment he looks vaguely stunned, turning his head to face Rupert. He blinks once or twice and shrugs, "I was just heading to the diner to get some dinner after picking up my dry cleaning. What're you doin' here man?" Fortunately, Rupert has completely deflected the subject of who rescued whom from Michael Clarke Duncan's ridiculously hardcore grasp.

"I'll only hold it if you ask nicely," Jolie replies with a wink. "Howya doin, Rupert? Oh, you know this guy already? Sweet."

Rupert smirks at Jolie. "He and David whipped it out the other day to see who was smallest. Pretty unimpressive showing from both." He shrugs and lights a cigarette with his gold Zippo. "Maia seems to be sweet on him, though. Well, him and the traitor bloke."

Woooooooooooohs! The sound of a screech of a beast can be heard not too far from the theater. It's off to the north and soon the body of the petite Japanese Scion lands, in full exorcist uniform. There's an oomph as she lands by the three while letting out a low groan of pain. She quickly looks around and blinks and lets out a soft chuckle, "Hey guys.."

"Meh. I wanted Monkey Boy to apologize to Maia, figured talking to him would be a good show of faith. I was wrong," replies Haldor. He rearranges his dry cleaning so he can fold his arms across his chest without looking like a schoolgirl coddling her books. "Maia's got a lot on her plate. She needs a close friend, I thi- Uh. Hi, Maia. Your, uh, your ears burnin'?"
Jolie shrugs. "She's got a thing for redheads. Which works for present company, but not for that traitor bloke. Man, I love the way you talk, Rupert! 'Bloke', 'you lot'…it's like watching an old episode of Doctor Who or Benny Hill." And then in comes Maia. "Whoah, nice landing! Uh…is that Cloverfield coming after you?"

Rupert blinks as Maia abruptly enters the conversation. He looks up at the sky and shouts, "And a gold-plated Strat fell from the sky into the hands of the motherfucking Ripper!"

Rupert waits for a long moment, then sighs and exhales a cloud of smoke. He glances at Jolie. "My mum -is- a Bitch. Remember that bloke from the Indiana Jones movie who tore out the other one's heart? He was offering that to Mum. She likes those offerings."

Haldor possesses a self-satisfied smirk for about seven seconds after Rupert replies to Jolie. The Viking glances up at the sky again for a moment, before shrugging a bit and looking toward Maia once more. "So, uh. What's with the giant white bathrobe?"

Maia oomphs a little as she wrinkles her nose and dusts herself off while looking over towards Rupert, Jolie and then Haldor. "do you guys really have to talk about what could or could not be my love life?" she says with a bit of a harumph as she looks towards the alleyway once more. "I got a message from one of the kami in the area that something was around.." and she points towards the alleyway.

"And this is a shikifuku, traditional onmyoudo garb. It helps me focus and it serves as a distraction.." she says, letting the long and large sleeves of her 'bathrobe' wave and flicker in the air. And she winces as there's the high pitched screech once more.

"I think Porky Pig is coming this way.."

"… Porky Pig? Can't we just throw a box of slop at it and call it a night? I mean Frigg 'n' Hel. How tough can a pig be?"

Yeah. Haldor, he's not really all that good with the Occult knowledge stuff. He forgot about the boar Heracles had to fight and kill… And, uh, boars in general as a matter of fact. The Viking keeps his arms folded across his chest, dry cleaning supported by said arms, as he snorts derisively in the direction of that porcine screech.

"Well, you distracted Big Red with it, so I guess it works," says Jolie with a grin. "A pig? I would make a swine flu joke, but that's all played out. So what do we do? Kill it? I hope it's not a red head, you might change your mind…"

Rupert groans and throws his cigarette to the ground. "For the love of-, every single time I meet you, something attacks." He reaches into one pocket and pulls out his bagh-nakh. He glares at Maia, removing his ever-present sunglasses "You're a jinx."

And there's the loud swine screech once more. Down the alley it can be seen. Hell, there's the smell of it's own feces. It's at least twenty feet long, hairy and ugly. It's tusks are nearly two feet long and it stares down our intrepid heroes before letting out another high pitched screech. It stares down our heroes and snorts a little.

Amongst it's thick hide and bristley skin, there seem to be…sheets of paper stuck in it? Yes, that's Maia's fault and as she looks down towards it, she lets out a soft chuckle under her breath. "One of the eggs produced this critter. I've been asking the security cameras around the city if there have been any large human sized eggs, like the ones we saw at the warehouse. Apparently, it wasnt a harpy. It's a hog..and a bigass one at that.."

Cue sub-boss music….Hogzilla!

Rupert glares at the huge pig as it dashes toward them. "I didn't order bacon," he mutters, leaping into a sprint directly toward the pig. "Look at me, Wilbur. And HEEL!" As he gets close enough to make eye contact with the pig, he stares deep into its eyes, assuming the full mantle of his semi-divine power to stop it in its tracks.

Pigs are notorious for well, being stubborn. Even the gaze of the Scion of Kali doesnt leave it inactive too long, though it does get a little weaker with it's resolve as it breaks off the mental charm over it. It tries to gore Rupert with it's tusks, but alas, he's too fast and it screeches once more in anger.

Haldor has to look upward to see the pig's eyes. This is faintly unnerving as he drops his dry cleaning, which is fortunately wrapped up in plastic and sufficiently dense in numbers to simply make a giant pile. A soft growl breaks free of the Viking's lips as he reaches into his hoody's pockets, withdrawing a pair of drumsticks.

Yes. Drumsticks. For making music with, lovely, lovely music.

As Hogzilla screeches past Rupert with its tusks, Haldor springs into action. He lurches into motion with alarming speed, though only for a few steps. Within about ten steps, the Viking takes to the air, leaping high and whirling in air as his drumsticks inexplicably shift into Viking-style short swords. Haldor swings with both swords at once, trying to ram the blades into the flank of the pig to gain a hold.

Haldor has a plan. A terrible. Terrible. Plan.

As the pig shakes off his influence, Rupert begins muttering to himself in a constant stream. "Fuckin' pigs," he bites out as he leaps up, flipping over the pig's head. "Uppity sausage. Had your mum for breakfast. Think I'll make myself a ham sandwich," As he decends from his arc, he lashes out with his claws in an attempt to rake a deep, bloody gouge in its side.

On the opposite side of the pig from Rupert and his claws, Haldor is cursing himself for this plan. He is also, notably, smiling without reservation because god damn this is cool. Blood sprays in a hot quasi-mist that drenches Haldor's face, red hair, and half of his hoody as the Viking gains footing on the side of the beast while his blades remain sunk into its side.

After several moments of silent jubilation, Haldor starts trying to scale the side of the pig with his Viking short swords. One. Blade. After. Another. Sinking. Into. Giant. Terrible. Porcine. Flesh.

Climbing is not nearly so damaging as first thought, but it is really fun. Especially when climbing a gigantic pig of death that you are planning on riding like a rodeo bull… To death. Haldor continues to smile broadly, crossing over the curve of the beast's flank and onto its delicious back now.

The Viking gets his feet under him, rising to a crouch while his short swords grow in size to something closer to a standard length sword. Haldor lets out a war whoop of amusement, fully intending to move forward and somewhat more upward on the pig, slamming his swords in and wrenching them free time and again.

With every wrench, Haldor flicks his wrist, sending a spray of pig blood raining down on the cars in Times Square so far below. Kong wasn't entirely wrong, /THIS/ is glorious. This is the way battle should be, even if it does feel a little like a Thor comic.

So much happening, so much bloody porcine chaos. And Jolie stands still. "Huh, I thought that Rupert couldn't touch pig," she ponders. But, despite her stationary position, her mind isn't still. She spots some thick construction cable a few yards away. There's always some construction in New York. And that gives her an idea. She runs over and quickly unwraps a large amount, then, holding the end, she runs over to the pig, at heroic speed. She runs around and around the pig with the cable, trying to wrap it's legs together. "Hogtying a hog! Whoda thunk it?"

Oh geeez, it's the blood and gore that well, she hates. Still, fortunately, things are in an alleyway, and the screeching sound of the pig cant be heard too much over the loud din of the New York City streets.

Maia starts rushing towards the creature before she yells out towards the others. "I'm pulling out some Sailor Moon shit! Don't look at me!" she cries out as she raises her hand up towards the sky, the ruby magatama glistening in the moon light. She looks up with a desperate plea. "Mother, please work with your brother to help us in defeating this creature.."

Really, there needs to be some sort of Jpop themesong as she says this before she's twirling around, the white flowing robes of her shikifuku raising up just a bit. All that's missing is sparkles. "I call upon your divine power. HEAVENLY FLARE!" she cries out before her body starts to glow…

As the Magical Japanese School girl starts doing her thing, the theme music should continue to play. Something like sailor Moon really, except she fights justice more by day light instead of night light. The pig just stares and lets out another screech before it's stunned and completely afixed towards the young woman. It's drooling and at this close range, everyone can smell it's shit.

Jolie speeds back out of the way now that the pig's legs are tied. She spots Maia out of the corner of her eye and grins. "Nice job, Bunny!"

Rupert finally leaps backward from the hogtied … hog. "Bugger this," he says. He glances at the other Scions and grins wickedly. "And now for the obligatory words: trust me." He bends down and picks up a rock from the ground in a smooth motion, spinning upward and tossing it straight at a flower pot on a windowsill of the building to the left.

"HEL'S FUCKIN' /YEAH/! WHO'S THE BITCH NOW, PIGGY?! WHO'S THE BITCH NOW?!"

Haldor stands up full upright atop the pig's back as Jolie finishes cable-grappling the enormous beast. A moment later he catches the sound and some of the glare of Maia's Heavenly Flare, but fortunately there is a GIANT HONKING PIG between his eyes and her. The Viking brings his swords together, both seeming to fuse together.

As Haldor moves toward the base of the pig's skull, his two swords become one enormous viking axe. He hefts it hight, the enormous weapon inexplicably light in his grasp. The Viking, blood-soaked and grinning in righteous, nearly berserker glory, takes a final step before he swings the axe. Moonlight and Heavenly Light glint off of its polished blade as he brings it around and down, aiming to carve clean into the beast's brain stem.

And the flower pot teeters just a bit. It starts wobbling back and forth a little more before suddenly rolling down the fireescape. That's the funny thing about fireescapes. They're always a little wobbly. Too wobbly really. There's a creak that can be heard just above Haldor as he brings down his blade over the pig's head. The hide of the pig is quite tough, and surely Haldor can attest to that, and perhaps he wouldnt of made a clean cut. But this time, there's fate on his side, or rather chaos as a loud squeaking sound of rusted metal can be heard behind him.

Much like how fate killed that boy in Final Destination, it aids in the finishing off of the Hogzilla. As Haldor strikes true on the pig, the force of a couple hundred pound ladder helps with his thrust as it strikes the axes just right. It's perfect really. The axe cuts through the pig's flesh like a hot knife on butter and soon the pig is headless. It would've healed too, but the ladder just gave the axe just enough oomph.

Now where's the chaos part? The blood splatters. It's a big ass pig and there's a lot of blood. Jolie, halder, Rupert and Maia are covered in blood. The onmyoudo's sheer and immaculately white dress is ruined, now a crimson from pig blood. "WHAT! THE! FUCK!?!?!?!?"

Jolie blinks, and laughs raucously. "Oh man, I feel like Carrie! Woo hoo!" She's a horror fan, she loves gore. She wipes her eyes, then grins at Maia. "You look good in red. I hope you've got a backup bathrobe." She grins at Haldor and Rupert. "Nice butchery, guys. Haldor, you're invited to any pigroast my family ever has." Jolie looks down at her clothes. "And I need a shower. Later, ya'll!" And she runs off.

Rupert looks down at his blood-covered form and shrugs. He reaches into his trench's inside pocket and pulls out a dry pack of cigarettes and his Zippo. Lighting one up, he looks around at the others. "Think the head'll look good mounted on the wall. Freddy, want to do the honors? Or we could have it stuffed and I can use it as a stage prop at the concert tomorrow."

Under the blood covering his face and upper body, Haldor is sweating a bit. Climbing and riding a giant pig while it is being mauled by people and otherwise on a rampage in a major metropolitan area is difficult work, even if you are the Scion of Thor. Not to mention he's wearing a hoody in this weather.

Haldor lets out a jubiliant war cry as he drives the axe down into that tough, meaty hide. The creak of the falling fire escape catches his attention and Haldor looks away from driving the axe in; his eyes widen and, if he had hands to do it, he might have even attempted to cringe away. Instead the fire escape crashes into the axe head, driving it pretty cleanly through the neck and spine of the beast.

And that's when the geyser of blood erupts from the gaping, sucking neck wound. Haldor is baptised in blood as are his fellow Scions, perhaps the most Viking-honest thing that's happened to him thus far this year. The Viking swings his axe again, driving it into the exposed end of the pig's spine, using it as a handhold as he rides the headless corpse to the ground as though he were riding an escalator.

"Fuck yeah! Pig roast sounds awesome!" Haldor pauses to look, blood dripping from his head and shoulders, at Rupert. "Man. We should so totally have this fucker stuffed. It would be /SICK/ as a stage prop for a metal concert; especially if you're doing a heavy-heavy set, man. We gotta find a fucking taxidermist /NOW/."

"…."

Of all the Scions present, it is the daughter of the genteel and proper Amaterasu who does not find bathing in blood to be any fun at all. There's clear shock and horror on her features as her immaculately white shikifuku has been stained blood red, and there's an unusual stench to it. She shudders and runs over towards the side as she throws up into the trash, hurling her dinner before she wipes at her lips.

"Why cant we just fight things that die cleanly? You know..like the vampires from Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Or ghosts?!? I can deal with ghosts. They dont spew blood all over when you defeat them.." she muses under her breath as she looks over towards Rupert and Haldor with a shake of her head.

Rupert smirks at Maia. "Where's the fun in that?" He turns to grin at Haldor. "Neat toys you got. Can you actually play with them?" He nods to Haldor's transfiguring drumsticks. He steps forward and finds a cleanish patch of hide on the pig corpse and wipes the blood off his bagh-nakh claws before returning them to his pocket.

Haldor leaps off of the pig's body, still dripping with blood as he hits the ground and wrenches the axe in twain. Idly Haldor wipes his hands and drumsticks off on the pig's hide as well before slipping his drumsticks into the pockets of his hoody.

"Yeah. My step-mom's been pretty coo- … Well, yeah. I can play with them. I was a drummer long before I ever started having to deal with Titanspawn or corrupted Scions and whatever the Frigg else has been hurled at me the past few months. Let me get a shower and a fresh hoody, I'll show you what I can do, man."

"My place then? I know I have my stuff there, and so does Haldor.." Maia says, as she motions towards the alleyway before hrmming, definitely thinking that would be a bad idea. "Um..okay..you can jump really high, right? Think I can piggyback?" she asks ever so innocently as she wrinkles her nose and tells Rupert the address to her own suite in the upper east side.

"Fine," Rupert agrees, blowing a cloud of smoke at the pig. "Now, how do we plan to transport Big Pig?"

The Viking nods a bit at Maia, looking toward Rupert and the Pig thoughtfully. A faint smile spreads across his face, but he doesn't explain it. Instead he wipes some blood off of his face with one hand, smearing it on the pig's hide as he regards the head.

"Well, uh. I'm not sure."

Maia heads on over, raising her brows and lets out a soft chuckle under her breath while beaming brightly towards Haldor. She takes that as a yes for now as she wrinkles her nose. "Well, we could go back to myplace, I can get us a UHaul truck and we can haul it from there?" she offers.

"Right," Rupert replies skeptically. "I'm not leaving the bleeding trophy in the street." He glances around suspiciously. "Come back find nothing but homeless people gnawing on the bones."

"Maybe I can carry it?"

Haldor looks at the pig's head, though he doesn't look convinced of his own might in this regard. That was a big ass pig. He rubs his bloody chin for the moment, glancing between it and Maia thoughtfully.

"It's huuuuge, if you can do it, I will definitely be impressed.." she says firmly and resolutely, not quite sure just how strong he is, but she sure is interested in seeing what he can do it. She cants her head to the side as she hrmms for a few moments, "But how are we going to /not/ get noticed in Times Square while doing it? We're covered in pig's blood…Times Square is full because of all the tourists, and I'm sure there were some people looking at us…and my apartment won't let in a 20 foot long pig carcass.."

"We can take it back to my hotel," Rupert offers. "Not far, and I've got the whole top floor." He shrugs. "They don't blink at anything I do anymore. Getting hard to shock. Think this piggy fuck will do it, though."

Haldor shrugs a little bit, "Alright… Carry my dry cleaning, Maia?" The Viking moves toward the head and crouches down near the front of the snout. He slaps his hands together and sucks in a deep breath before wrapping his arms as far around the snout as they will go. "HRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGH!"

Haldor looks utterly shocked as he stumbles back a few steps after several long seconds of work. You would be too if you found yourself inexplicably able to lift a giant pig head.

And Maia does as she's asked, taking the dry cleaner after she wipes up the rest of her blood on her features. She blinks a little, chewing on her bottom lip as she looks towards Haldor, quite surprised by the whole thing. "Woah…that's…" and she pauses trying to find the right word for it, but alas, Paris Hilton will do as she said it best. "Hot.."

The bags of dry cleaning are lifted up easily by Maia, cause well, it isnt 1500 lbs.

Rupert snickers at Maia's expression and turns to head down the street toward the Diamond. "Oh, remember, when we walk in covered in blood and holding a giant pig carcass, smile at the bellhops. Keeps the cheeky little buggers in their place."

"Duly noted," replies Haldor. He is very grateful for, although not aware of in the same terms, his Epic Dexterity. It is proving very helpful in keeping him balanced just so as he carries this enormous pig head. The Viking marches along behind Rupert, offering a blood-soaked smile to Maia. "And Kong didn't think I liked fighting Titanspawn."

"Don't worry about David..he just likes being a dick.." Maia says softly under her breath. There's clear bitterness there as she starts to follow as she wrinkles her nose and stretches her arms into the air. She raises a brow over towards Rupert while hrmming for a few moments. "You wouldnt happen to have any groupie's clothes that I could borrow when we get to your place do you? I really want to take a shower.."

Rupert smirks again. "If there aren't, there's some groupies I can get out of them for you. And stop being sore about monkey-boy. You can't play with trickster-types and not expect to get the short end."

"I gotta agree with The Ripper. Cap'n Simian's trying too hard to be his daddy's boy, he's totally misunderstanding the role of trickster on a team… But tricksters often do turn out to be kind of douche bags. It's predictable."

Haldor may not need a shower so much as a fresh change of clothes after this. The Viking is sweating as he carries the pig head along. It's cutting it close to his absolute limit and it kind of shows, but at least he's apparently got the staying power to keep going for now.

"He'll learn whatever it was that his daddy learned about being a douche soon enough."

Whoooosh—thump! "What, that no matter how much of a douche you are, if you're a big enough badass, eventually you become immortal and loved by all?" David lands in the street, and peers at Haldor as he carries the huge pigmonster head. "You want a hand with that? Looks like you're straining a bit."

"No..you don't understand the history between his family and mine. My mother told me the story about it.."

And there's a soft pause for a bit as she just walks alongside them, waiting for Rupert to lead them through the alleyways as she keeps a wary eye out for any other Titanspawn that might be nearby. And then there's the woosh as David enters as she groans a little. She's still covered in blood and groans under her breath not even looking towards the monkey boy. Yes, she's still pissed. Like her mother, she holds grudges.

Rupert just grins to himself as he leads the group to his hotel. "Play nice, children," he comments mockingly, and soon they reach the parking lot of the Diamond. "And don't forget to smile when we get inside."

"I figured it was something along the lines of 'Pranks can help or hurt, but being an ass always ends with your face in shit.' But, eh. Whatever. Today's been a damned good day, especially after beheading this beastie."

Haldor grins at David, it's a barely subdued smile. Apparently Haldor had fun in fighting this particular Titanspawn. The Viking shrugs a bit at the question, adjusting his grip on the pig's snout.

"Should be fine. I can set it down once I get to the freight elevator."

"He's right," David remarks. "Always smile at the bellboys when you're carrying an inexplicably large pigmonster head. Then, later, we can play 'try to guess what they thought was going on'. I like that game." David falls into step beside Rupert, hands shoved into the pockets of a 70s-era yellow suit that would look more at home in a movie with the name 'Disco' in it. Yellow Inferno: Disco Invades The Orient, maybe. "The Monkey King only ended up anywhere close once. And his wrath beat down the very gates of heaven, and started a war with an entire pantheon." Pulling a hand out of one pocket, David palms the peach he's withdrawn, considers it a moment, then takes a rather overlarge bite, juice running down the corner of his mouth. "He won."

"You know…we could've helped you.." Maia whispers softly, still annoyed as hell that her beautiful ceremonial dress is covered in pig's blood. She sighs a little and runs her fingers through her blood soaked hair as she stretches her arms into the air, not looking over towards Rupert or David. She's still miffed. Grrr.

Rupert appears completely oblivious to Maia's discontent as he leads the group into the spacious lobby. He smirks at the looks they get, and very deliberately bares his teeth in overly-polite smile at the bellboys. "Nothing to see here, boys. Just conquering heroes. We're gonna need beer and steak. Make sure you get the temperatures right, eh? -Cold- beer and -hot- steak."

As repeatedly requested, Haldor provides gawkers and, most especially, the bellboys with a broad, toothy, blood-soaked smile. His strength and stamina are continuing to be tested, but he doesn't quite seem to be at the threshhold. Instead the Viking just keeps moving, angling toward where he thinks the freight elevator should be. Threshhold or no threshhold, Haldor just wants to set the damned thing down for a few minutes.

"Uh, actually," David comments, "My beer room temperature, and my steak? Just -barely- warm in the middle, please." A bright-white grin at the others. "And send towels. My friends were a bit messy in procuring their giant pig-head. Sloppy of them." A glance at Haldor, and the son of Sun Wu Kong asks, again, "Sure you don't want any help with that?"

"Point me to the freight elevator and hit the up button, if you would be so kind," replies Haldor.

Maia looks around, letting out a soft chuckle under her breath. She forces a toothy and flashy grin as she winks towards the bellboys. They're men, and she's the daughter of a sun goddess. She's beautiful to behold, and having an ability to take all the attention away from the others and onto yourself is pretty handy at times. "Um..may I have a towel please?" she asks curiously, fluttering her eyelashes and soon, several of the bell boys go off and all offer her towels.

She winks towards each of them and giggles impishly. "Thanks!" she chirps before starting to wipe herself off before rushing to catch up with the others.

Rupert rolls his eyes at Maia's antics. "Keep your panties on, luv." He points Haldor to a hallway. "Freight's down that way. I'm taking the normal elevator. There's a corner I haven't pissed in yet."

"Hey, I'm sure you can get the button. Try hitting it with one foot. Just sort of lean and counterbalance. You'll figure it out." Instead of helping Haldor, David jams a finger into the button for the main elevator with Rupert, shooting the viking a bright white smile, similar to the one the bellboys got.

Haldor leans his body around the side of the pig head. The Viking squints at David for a moment, though the expression slowly turns devious. "Hey, Ripper. Your penthouse has a balcony, right?"

Maia just rolls her eyes a little as she wipes her face off, smearing the towels in pig's blood. She heads over towards Haldor, offering to help once more. "You dont have to carry this all on your own.."

"Careful, luv," Rupert warns Maia. "Those elevators have weight limits. Might tip it over the scale. And yeah, got a balcony. Overlooks the pool." He hits the button and an empty elevator opens immediately. "Love it when that happens."

"Nah. That's fine. I'll make do. You go take an elevator ride," replies Haldor to Maia. The expression on his face is endlessly devious, playful really. Gently he motions with his head for Maia to hop on the elevator with David and Rupert.

Maia nods, seeming a bit hesitant to do so before she dashes towards the elevator before the door closes. Oh boy, this is going to be awkward. She crosses her arms over her chest and just waits to go on up.

Rupert hits the button for the top floor and crosses his arms, waiting as the door closes and the elevator begins moving up. He smirks at Maia the whole ride. A few seconds later, the bell dings and the door opens on a large hallway. He heads down and takes a left at an intersection. "Frieght comes out over here. We've got a couple empty rooms big enough to hold it."

Haldor waits until the elevator doors have closed behind the trio inside of it. Promptly the Viking walks back out of the lobby and the building. He turns a corner and moves into the closest approximation of an alley he can find. The Viking looks at his runic bracer and considers it carefully, breathing deep and slow as he focuses himself.

"Alright, Unc. Let's see if this thing'll do somethin' other than let me fall safely."

After about a minute and a half of quasi-meditation and resting his weary muscles, Haldor grabs the pig head by the snout again. Slowly, but surely, the Viking starts marching straight upward with the head. No stairs, no wall, no ladder. Just… Up.

"So," David comments, once the doors slide closed and the elevator begins to ascend. "I take one night off and you guys kill a pigmonster without me."

"Yeah, it went beautifully actually. Team work. No one tried to hog all the glory." Maia says firmly and resolutely, her tone matter of fact. But yes, she's still miffed at the monkey.

"Freddy did most of the work," Rupert comments. "Not really my specialty, but not even I can ignore giant titanspawn pigs running through Times Square."

The higher Haldor climbs, the faster he moves. By the time he's gotten half-way up the height of the Diamond, the Viking is moving at his maximum speed. It shouldn't take him long at all to crest Rupert's balcony.

And Maia just looks over towards David for a bit as he's still quiet. And then there's the ding of the elevator. The elevator opens to Rupert's suite…

Rupert exits the elevator. "Be it ever so humble," he says with a mocking bow. "I call it home." He leads them into a large suite of open rooms, littered with empty pizza boxes, half-crushed beer cans, and hastily taped posters of naked women and album covers on the walls. "Don't worry about being interuppted. The band's rooms are across the hall, and they're probably stoned out of their gourds by now."

Haldor can see he's going to have to get stronger. There is also a good chance that he is also going to need to get faster. Flying this slow is kind of silly, even if it is running upward. Due upward. Grumbling, Haldor crests the edge of the balcony and skids upward for a few moments before flipping foward.

Out in the hallway, Rupert, Maia, and David are likely to hear the nearly catastrophic *WHATOOM* of Haldor and the pig head crash landing on the balcony.

And hear the crash she does. Maia's eyes widen as she looks over towards Rupert and David expectantly before she rushes towards the balcony while wrinkling her nose. "Geeeez…." she says with a bit of a facepalm as she goes over to see what exactly is going on.

Rupert follows Maia at a leisurely pace. "There's a good chap," he says urbanely to Haldor. "A bit to the left, and we'll see to it in the morning."

Haldor is splayed in a most uncomfortable looking position on a chaise. Beside him is the pig's head, upside down and twisted to a slight three-quarter profile. It may, in fact, be on top of the ruins of a poolside table. The Viking grunts at Rupert, shoving the head with one arm to make it roll a bit to Rupert's left as directed.

"Frigg 'n' Hel, I'm tired as a Valkyrie's turd."

"Here, lemme help you.."

Maia heads on over as she offers her hand towards the viking with a bright smile before tossing the still unused extra towels towards his face. "You should clean up.." she says with a sage nod before letting out a soft chuckle at his reference before looking over towards Rupert.

"So..your band won't notice this bleeding mess huh.."

Rupert snorts. "Don't rightly give a shit. I didn't ask questions when I found twenty-eight used condroms in a shoebox in Will's luggage." He shakes his head. "Strange bloke, that one. Not right in the head. But he can play lead guitar like no one's business."

Haldor grabs the proffered hand and hauls himself to his feet. Once standing, he takes the towels tossed at him and starts wiping surface, not-yet-stain-set blood from his pants and hoody.

"Well, perhaps we should get going then?" Maia says, once Haldor is standing up once more. "I mean the pig's head is here and you're using it for your next concert. And I dont know what else you've got planned.." she admits ruefully, letting out a soft chuckle under her breath as she glance around once more, not wanting to overstay their welcome.

Rupert shrugs. "Up to you. There's room enough to crash here if you want, otherwise, door's that way," he gestures. "I'll call some people in the morning and get this taken care of."

"I'd rather just crash here. Besides, I owe Ripper a show of my drumming skills once I'm cleaned up a bit."

Haldor rubs the back of his head a bit, using the towel to clean some blood from his hair and neck. The Viking regards Maia curiously, inspecting her face and body language as he tries to clean himself off a bit.

It's dirty. It's disorderly. It's…a bachelor pad. It's the complete antithesis to Maia's own sleek and sophisticated apartment in the Upper East Side, and well, the lack of order, harmony and the fact that it's a pigsty makes the young woman most definitely uncomfortable.

"Um..I'll just head home then.." Maia says with a bow towards Rupert before smiling warmly towards Haldor. "So um..yeah.." she says softly, glancing around furtively in the end.

"Psst," Rupert stage whispers to Haldor. "Kiss de girl." He rolls his head and heads for the wetbar. "Promise I won't watch and make snarky comments."

Haldor peers inquisitively at Maia. The Viking really needs to learn how to put clues together, because right now, inside of his brain, his hemispheres are attempting to smash four dimensional objects into two dimensional holes of completely the wrong shape and size.

"Wha-"

Haldor peers at Rupert and then at Maia. Man. Did someone post a celestial 'Japanese chick magnate' sign over his head or something? The Viking watches Rupert walk away before moving closer to Maia and quietly inquiring, "You sure you don't want to stay? We're just gonna chill. Plenty of room here for the lot of us, for now at any rate. Besides, we should all get cleaned up before we wander away, ne?"

Even Maia was taken by surprise at that. She blinks blankly looking towards Rupert before her cheeks flush bright beet red as she squirms a little as she stands. She hrmms, looking around once more at the rock star's 'palace' and sighs as she shrugs her shoulders.

"Nah, I really should get back. Have a few things that need to be taken care of.." and her glance goes over to David. Clearly, she still wants to avoid him, much like her mother avoids things that annoys her.

"Alright… I guess. Take care of yourself, Maia."

The Viking kisses her lightly on the forehead and starts making his way toward the bathroom. A shower is what Haldor needs… In part because that is a perfect excuse for a scene to fade to black.

As the door opens and Maia steps outside, there's David. He takes her by the shoulders, dips her over backwards, kisses her thoroughly for about seventeen seconds, deposits her back on her feet, and says, "-That's- how you kiss a girl, Chibi. Try again."

"… Are you sure you're not a Scion of Hel?"

Haldor, half-tangled in his t-shirt and hoody while half-way into the bathroom, peers toward David and Maia. The Viking shakes his head a bit, though he doesn't really take his eyes off of the pair of them.

Rupert just shakes his head from where he's pouring himself a drink. "He's either a poof or dumber than his father."

And there's a blink. What the heck just happened?

Maia stares towards David a bit, still seething towards Son Goku before she looks towards Haldor for a few moments. She has no idea what to do and starts beelining towards the door.

Reaching up, David plucks a piece of bubble gum from his mouth, peers at it for a few moments, then looks over his shoulder toward a fleeing Maia. "Hey, Pink Ranger! Did you lose some gum? I've got no idea where the fuck this came from!"


4 XP awarded.


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